When I Grow Up...

I wanna be famous. I wanna be a star. I wanna be in movies. When I grow up I wanna see the world, drive nice cars. I wanna have groupies (boobies?). Okay so I'm not actually talking about the Pussycat Dolls song. This post will vibe with all those high school and college kids or recent graduates who are sick of being asked what they wanted to do when they grow up.

I know that nobody intends to piss you off when they ask that question but that's usually what happens. When you graduate high school people want to know where you're going to college, what you're studying and what you plan to do with that course of study. In college they still ask what you're studying and what you want to do with your degree. Then when you graduate everyone asks what you're doing with the expectancy that you have landed a great, high-paying job with benefits in the field of your major. Yeah right.

Even if we know where we want to go to college or what we want to study, the answer to the question, "What do you want to do when you grow up?" or "What do you want to do with your major?" Is still a highly frustrating one. Even more so is when people assume that you are going to do one specific thing with your major, as if teaching is the only thing I can do with an English major.

Editing and publishing was my answer to the dreaded question for a long time because it was a semi-obvious career for an English major that wasn't teaching. But as time wore on it just became an answer to a question. A way to deflect deeper questions and inquiries because if I gave them the truth to the question, "I have no f*&%$@g idea," those questions and inquiries would be sure to follow.

A lot of adults in the working world today are still under the delusion that kids with college degrees today will go into a field relative to what they majored in and will have the job for most of, if not all of, their career. That just isn't how it works today. We live in a world of betterment and progress and are constantly trying to improve our situations. People today get jobs and work their asses off to try and move upwards. It might be a different position, it might mean a whole other company or field. The working world is constantly in flux because of this betterment mentality. It isn't necessarily a bad thing but just because you've had the same job for 40 years with the same company in the same tiny office, don't expect us to want that. We'll feed you a bullshit answer if you want one: "I'm an English major, and I want to go into editing and publishing." But it's going to be just that, bullshit.

If you want the truth, ask what we're interested in. What are our passions? Did we like school and the subject we studied? Do we have any interest in graduate school? Those sorts of questions are apt to draw out more specific responses and are less likely to drive a student up a wall or into a corner where they feel bad telling you the truth that they don't know what they want to do when they grow up.

And let's be honest, did you always know what you wanted to do when you grow up? Did you do it? Are you in the same field you told everyone you'd be in? Are you working in the field of your major? Did you ever want to sneeze in someone's face when you were asked for the ten bazillionth time, "What do you want to do when you grow up?"

Well, did you?

Respectfully,

-Kate

Why Backwards?

The title of my blog, Going With It: The Backwards Life of a Twenty-Something, may seem a little odd. For one who does not know my story and I personally, it would indeed be confusing to use the word "backwards." I hope that by sharing a bit of my story that I might begin to shed a little light upon the thought process behind the title.

I am in my early twenties, still in college, and in a happy relationship with my boyfriend of 19 months. As you may know from mentions in my previous posts, I am also a mother to a 4 month old baby boy, Alex. Alex was far from being part of the plan. Thus I have accepted the fact that I am going to do my life backwards.

I had my kid first, am finishing college second, hoping to get married third, have some sort of a job or career fourth, and then perhaps have some more kids. It typically goes college, career, marriage, kids, and then more kids. My life is a mixed up version of that and due to this backwards order I have needed to develop a "go with it" philosophy.

Having Alex before completing college, getting married and all that other stuff threw me for a major loop as well as tossed in a whole heap of unexpected challenges. The best way that I have found to deal with them thus far is to just go with it. Resistance will get me nowhere and only create hassles. So there you have it--Going With It: The Backwards Life of a Twenty-Something.